From Ron White


As you celebrate your 60th birthday, I feel it necessary to remind you of some of the past endeavors we had together.

The Boat Cover:

After my surgery in 2001, I downsized to a 17 ft. boat. Having had a cover for a 23 foot boat, you and I, during Thanksgiving, 2002, proceeded to construct a framework that would support that enormous cover and also be storageable in the off season. We had a ball, freezing fingers, drilling, sawing, screwing (not in that sense, sorry!!!) and finishing a structure that lasted many years, as well as enjoying a great Thanksgiving Day celebration!

The Shelf Supports:

So, Barbara and I are at your house and you remark that you would like to get some spindles for a pair of shelves you would like to build in the pantry. As a matter of fact, you asked if I had a lathe. Other than, perhaps being able to spell lathe, you had little idea about what would be involved in making spindles. Well, I did make them and presented them to you that Christmas and you not only loved them, we constructed the shelves, painted them and installed them, and to this day they remain a reminder of our fun building stuff together!

The Side View Mirror:

I forget exactly when, but you needed to replace the side view mirror on your car. Barbara and I were at your house and you asked me to assist you in this endeavor. Since you were the technician, and I was simply the assistant, I remember your policy with repairing things seemed to be “if it doesn’t fit, get a bigger hammer!” With the fury of a mountain lion, and the strength of a body builder, you proceeded to rip off the old mirror, slam in the new one, and force seemingly unprepared screws into sheet metal so fast that I had to ask, “Do you do everything at 90 mph?!!”  To which you laughingly responded, YES!


With some trepidation, I agreed to go canoeing with you and Renee. I have forgotten the time and place of departure, but you, Renee, Barbara and I began our journey nicely. Unfortunately, while you and Renee plied the waters as efficiently as our ancestors’ navigated streams and lakes, Barbara and I circled incessantly, barely traveling a few hundred yards per hour.  Thankfully, nary a word was ever spoken about how pathetic we were.

The Workshop:

Evan, your workshop is similar to most husbands.  Need a wrench???  It’s here, somewhere. Have a drill??? Oh yeah, here it is, but the battery is dead. We need to recharge it. Do you have some 2 inch screws?  Yeah, they’re here somewhere, or maybe they’re upstairs on the porch.  Well, ‘whatever’, (to be explained in more detail below) we have to do, let’s do it. (at 90 mph I must remind you all!!!)

The Carport:

This was an adventure, similar to you guys moving upstairs. Barbara, me, Lefty Laura and Don all pitched in to reconstruct the ailing carport on the side of the house. Your phrase, Evan, “whatever!”, was premier in our minds as we cut wood (whatever), used the same configuration (whatever), made the same rectangles (whatever) resulted in a similar, sturdy carport that all of us, including the vines, were proud of!

Evan, as you leave the “F” years and enter the “S” years, continue your yearning for love, happiness, family and friendships as you have done so brilliantly in the past.  May you celebrate this birthday, and many more ahead, knowing how much you are loved.    



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